Marriage & denial of bride to go with groom

Real event, in a village of Bihar,bride refuses to go with groom.!

The groom too much devoted to his father. to questions bride's friends on how he would keep her,he said, just as my father wishes.

the bride,hearing this, refused to go with newly wedded husband. the marriage was cancelled.

expert comments solicited.      

Replies 1 to 11 of 11 Descending

excellant thought.

Marriage rituals were over. the lady refused altogether and no body could explain sense to her.

Sanjay Vedula
Sanjay Vedula
from Hyderabad
13 years ago

Marriage is a super delicate topic to comment on. 

Very very right.

but everyone,excepting a few, embraces it at some point in life.

 

any more comments????

Sanjay Vedula
Sanjay Vedula
from Hyderabad
13 years ago

no more Tongue out

''just as my father wishes''.

I think the girl made the right dicision.  The bridegroom it seems has no idea about why he marries.  But the girl it seems is not willing to put up with such a man.

 

i think it was better for groom too.

Unknown
Unknown
from Hyderabad, India
13 years ago

haha.. if I get a chance..will laugh out loud in front of the groom and bride...

what kind of marriage is it.. he  should be happy that it got over.. cos..if a girl can break her relationship for just words..there is no guarantee in future also..

for the girl..she should have had talked to the guy before..on what all her priorities are..so that they could avoid all the waste of money, time..and above all prestige... they have become a topic ..being discussed here in this forum...

it should be an arranged marriage for sure...but very badly arranged..should blame the elders on both sides for this..they are also responsible :)

thats my 2cents!

@ unknown, very right,

surely ,an arranged one, found place in newspapers too in bihar,

 

 

Aldeena
Aldeena
from New Delhi
13 years ago

@ unknown: I think you seem to be not thinking of the realities in Indian societies... Even the urban societies have families marrying off their children forcibly against their wishes, need not talk about rural areas...

@ the others: And no offence..but this is my opinion from a woman's perspective...a girl leaves her entire world, everything she has know behind to marry this man, in cases of arranged marriages, whom she barely knows.. the least she can expect is for the man to have a backbone, have a mind of his own and stand by her and have the balls to say that.. he could have siad "I'll take very good care of her" or "I'll Keep her very happy" or something... No offence but there's no telling with in-laws.. what if the father asks his son to harass his wife for dowry or whatever..? is the wife supposed to live with a man who has no mind of his own? I'd rather die than live with someone like that!

But here one doesn't really know what really happened leading upto this...what exactly provoked the girl..so one cannot pass any judgements... As Sanjay rightly said, it's a super delicate topic to comment upon...

@ Aldeena,

I was waiting for the viewpoints  of a lady,

you r very right from all the aspects,.of a ladies viewpoint, Smile

a man's viewpoint should be also seen:.  here marriages are done of boys highest age would be 20,21, purely unmatured,non earner in the family, even petty  pocketmoney he gets from father.

I can say this or ask this of all men who are married and have not cried at the time of vidaai,

now a nervous little boy , un groomed , sorrounded by girls friends or saheli's is doubly nervous,

I donot say that his answer is right, but a girl who jumps to conclusions, taking harsh decisions of life., a little too unwarranted, and the boy & the girl both should feel themselves saved. 

 

 

 

Aldeena
from New Delhi
13 years ago

I don't know Pramod.. Even in the worst of circumstances one should be clear about what one wants.. In fact it's in pressure situations that it is most required..If a guy cannot handle a wedding how can a woman expect him to handle bigger challenges in life ahead..

And as to the point about crying at bidaai, I think my comment already answered this but I'll say it again, a guy's nervousness and a girl's tears at a wedding cannot be compared..no way! The girl is leaving everything behind at beginning a new life, she's leaving the life she has known for 20-25 odd years, she is going into this family where everyone is a stranger to her, there are fears, there is sorrow at leaving her family, her parents behind- it really cannot be compared to the nervousness of the boy..really!

I would say she should have talked to him once about what he said before doing what she did, but I don't hold her guilty. I would have done the same if i had been in her place and the guy had stuck to what he said.

But as you rightly poited out, yes the guy and girl both were saved from a disaster that could have been their marriage...

Aldeena
from New Delhi
13 years ago

*pointed (typo error! Embarassed)

@ALDEENA, great thinking,

i agree fully, Smile


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