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Please review my Blog on my new book " I AM DIRTY ; I NEED WASHING"

Shamsud Ahmed
Shamsud Ahmed
from Pune
7 years ago

 This is a Blog on the recently published book - "I AM DIRTY; I NEED WASHING". The book is of mix genres written over the years. I am currently working on my next Book "SHADES AND VERSES" which is a book of Poetry with associated photography where the readers would be taken to a different world where they can visualize each written verse. You will find few unedited Poems from my next book too.

Please help me with constructive feedback which would help my readers go thourgh my poems and also anything where you see opportunities to improve.

CheersSmile and Keep Winning,

Shamsud Ahmed

Replies 1 to 7 of 7
Mahesh Ramgopal
Mahesh Ramgopal
from Chennai
7 years ago

hey dis is amhesh here . i wanna tell u dat all your poemsr fantastic :) :) btw can u help me out wid publishing a book of poems . i hav written arnd 40-50 poems n i desperately wanna publish it . if possible can u giv me contacts of sum publishers

Shamsud Ahmed
Shamsud Ahmed
from Pune
7 years ago

Hi Mahesh, Thank you for your kind words. happy that you liked my poems. There are few things to publishing. I will not try and sound negative and would help you with everyting posssible. Firstly 1) Do you have a ready book which is edited and also been proof read. 2) Did you take feeedback from people. 3) Most importantly ...did you send your work to publishers. I am sending you a list of publishers of Poetry and you might wish to create a standard proposal letter and send across few of your poems to each one of them.

http://www.publishersglobal.com/directory/publishers-by-subject.asp?publishers-of=Poetry

Please note that you would not know who would be publishing it...so please do not judge by the name. In some cases they might ask you upfront money so you need to take  a call. In a place like India we have too many create geniuses and most of the publishers take advantage. however, please let me know if you can help me with 2-3 of your poems in a word format for me to discuss with my publisher in case they wish to publish. In you write short stories you can send a reqay to Prashant Karhade <karhade@gmail.com> of APK PUblishers. let me know if youe need any other help...i am available at shamsud.ahmed@gmail.com

 

Mahesh Ramgopal
Mahesh Ramgopal
from Chennai
7 years ago

tks for the info .    i havent edited the poems or proof read dem so dats a start. 

here's one of ma poems titled "Tribute to the unsung cook"

Cook Oh! Mighty I pray to you

The world looks up to you

For a constant supply of food from you.

 

The hard work put in by you

Can’t be matched even if anyone would like to,

You are sometimes in confusion

But brew the right concoction

In the right proportion.

 

You score eagles in time,

And bogeys in quality and quantity,

Your knees may wilt under pressure

Still you are as cool as a cucumber, and

You serve the right dish to the right customer.

 

You face tasks uphill,

But your determination makes it a ski-downhill.

 

Blood boils when civilians die

But when a cook dies

Only the broth boils - untended to.

 

Oh! Mighty cook I pray to you

For without your services

What will the world do.

 

 

- In memory of the cooks who sacrificed their lives to serve the guests at The Taj and Oberoi Hotels, Mumbai during 26/11 terrorist attack.

 

Shamsud Ahmed
Shamsud Ahmed
from Pune
7 years ago
Mahesh...you need to start working on your poems. You are not really required to rhyme all your lines. It is very important for you to put things intillegently and you need to understand your audiance. I am sorry but at this point in time i would like to suggest you to go through poems of all the good Poets here...i have read some really great poems here in this forum. You can also visit site like booksie.com or http://www.voicesnet.org/displayonepoem.aspx?poemid=224094 to learn about Poems and also to know many otheer forms of poems. Who knows simply changing your stlye of writing may help. Do not waste your energy looking for a publisher. Please let me know once you are ready with 30 + good poems and I will help you publish your book....thats a promise. Till then please practise.Select your subject carefully. I will try and rewrite the above poems for you which might help you understand. I started with very simple poems when i was in school and graduated from there with feedbacks from many. Read one of my Poems written when i was 13 years old and made some changes before publishing the poem few months back....buy some good book of poetry and you will get a grip. http://iamdirtyineedwashing.blogspot.in/search/label/ELUSIVE%20NYMPH You can always get back to me if you need any help write to me at shamsud.ahmed@gmail.com
Mahesh Ramgopal
Mahesh Ramgopal
from Chennai
7 years ago

hey srry for dat dis thing was written wen i was in 10th

 

Mahesh Ramgopal
Mahesh Ramgopal
from Chennai
7 years ago

Behold us a country Who were much feared & proudIn the days of yoreBut look again ; And You will dismiss it as folklore.Ya Allah! We did nothing wrongBut are forced to sing this mournful song .Gone are the days when our economy used to rumbleNowdays it just struggle & fumble.You accuse us of warring At the drop of the hatBut you don’t notice the bickeringGoing on inside your flat .You accuse us of being warmongersBut look again ,you will findThe truth behind the veil .Ya Allah! We did nothing wrong But are forced to sing this mournful song .We are trapped in our countryLike rats in a cageAnd are forced to Die before old age

Ya Allah! We did nothing wrongBut are forced to sing this mournful song .All relegions promote peaceAnd for this we beg to the fraternityImmediately stop this enemityWe beg of you please.The different warring factions Have torn the country into fractionsThey don’t care about peoples’ sentimentsWhich they broken to fragments .Why is it that you always Look at the rotten side of an appleAnd ignore the good side ?Why is it that civilliansHave to bear the brunt Of masses, for the work of militants ?There is light at theEnd of every tunnel , AndWe can only hope, ThatThis one isn’t as long as a funnel.We can’t rise like a phoenix from the ashesCause we are always getting the bashes.Ya Allah!we did nothing wrongBut are forced to sing this mournful song .Holding fort is not our way, AndWe don’t wish to keep our friends at bay.For the fire that burned We are now being spurnedWe are all concerned, ForWe can’t leave without a foul tag being earned.Ya Allah!we did nothing wrong But are forced to sing this mournful song .Why is it that Even ThoughThe fire is being extinguishedWe are not being distinguished?It is for compassion & peace that we yearnBut we are forced to accept our fateWithout making way for hate .All our efforts are in vainBut we are forced to endure the pain.All relegions promote peaceAnd for this we beg to the fraternityImmediately stop this enemityWe beg of you please.Ya Allah!we did nothing wrong But are forced to sing this mournful song

Shamsud Ahmed
Shamsud Ahmed
from Pune
7 years ago
WHAT IS YOUR FORMULA? yes what is your formula of LIfe. Read on to http://iamdirtyineedwashing.blogspot.in/p/careless-talks.html