Which is more important marriage or career?

Anjali Sengar
Anjali Sengar
from Gurgaon
6 years ago

Whenever I call my married friends especially female, they always have long list of problems of married life. One common complain of each female is sacrifice of career coz of marriage. They say we were better before marriage, there is no benefit of getting married. 

            So my point is which is more important marriage or career?

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Replies 1 to 20 of 28 Descending

Both, as they supplement each other, even Ratan Tata says the same..

cmvt
from Vishakapatnam
6 years ago

Do we really want to take advice from Ratan Tata who never got married :)

Hunky @ NexGenBikes.com
from Kolkata
6 years ago

Either you learn by watching others make mistake or you can learn from your own mistake Tongue out

HR
HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

So, don't get married ever...continue with your career...Tongue out

Anjali Sengar
Anjali Sengar
from Gurgaon
6 years ago

He he he.. Nice one cmvt..

There is no one right answer to this. Smile All depends what is your priority in life.  You need to trade-off between family and career.

In my opinion, at least one (and it need not be the woman always) has to have child-care as his/her first priority so that the other can concentrate more on earning. (And both the tasts are equally challenging). But  a balance can certainly be achieved. (Like one of the partners working part-time and taking care of home). But you need to be contented with the balance. You can’t have best of both worlds always. You can have your tea with more milk and less tea (milky tea), or less milk and more tea (semi-black tea), but you can’t have a tea which has more milk and more tea. Smile You must know what is your taste before ordering the tea.

And just curious to know….....why your friend who repent getting married, haven’t yet filed for divorceyet????  Innocent

Believe me marriage has its own sets of gifts… may be your friends have just taken them for granted or they are’t telling you….Wink

Anjali Sengar
from Gurgaon
6 years ago

Hey some of them have taken divorce within 1 yr of marriage Tongue out.. He he he.. I think now a days couples have ego problem..

Gaurab
from New Delhi
6 years ago

Divorce within a year...which fast-track court they visited Tongue out

Shantinath Chaudhary
from Hyderabad
6 years ago

LOL really, divorce within 1 yr!! Smile Actually I think there is legal provision of 6 months' "cooling off" period, before the legal divorce could be allowed by court. So a divorce could take at least 6-7 months to get finalized. That means the couple decided about divorce, within 5-6 months of the marriage!! That is really quick decision. May be they were married against their wishes, and had other plans since the beginning itself!! Smile

The best answer is "To each his/her own"

Gaurab
Gaurab
from New Delhi
6 years ago

Do whatever you want to do Tongue out

Then blog about it...would love to read your experience Tongue out Cool

Ranjith
Ranjith
from hyderabad
6 years ago
Marriage :s
HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

I understand your situation R/Kittu Cool

knitha.urs
knitha.urs
from Bangalore
6 years ago

marriage is a honey trap.............

Anjali Sengar
from Gurgaon
6 years ago

Hey Knitha, why u called marriage a honey trap?

HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

Ok, put it in this way - marriage is a money trap (for some) Tongue out and marriage is a ego trap (for some).

Amarendra Bandla
Amarendra Bandla
from Bangalore
6 years ago

Both. Being independent is as important as being part of a family. Those who think that the current job is too hectic should have the guts to take a job with less work pressure even though that job pays less. something is better than nothing.

Shravya Gunipudi
Shravya Gunipudi
from Hyderabad
6 years ago

Each person has his own priorities. Just because I may prefer career over marriage or vice versa, it does not mean that one cannot choose to have both. 

It's up to personal choice. I know women who blame marriage for having to give up their careers and I also know women managing both perfectly well. Your outlook is the one that determines the path you choose.

 

 

Anjali Sengar
from Gurgaon
5 years ago

Hmmm.. Nice answer Shravya :)

I think i am one of the most eligible ones to comment and my advice i am sure can help greatly, but it doesn't come free. I have opened a shop, "the advice shop" anyone who feels the need of advice I am present. I hope this isn't ssp. God knows my intentions. Amen.
No takers on a matter of extreme importance. My shop may close due to arrogance of clients but my well wishes none the less. May you all prosper in leap and bounds.
HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

I know you are well-wisher Cool

Thank goodness, one supporter.
HR
HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

Don't get married, don't marry and don't marry. Carry on with career, career and careers Cool.

I just pity people taking free advice. No takers for paid one on one direct counsel.
I remember having read of a praying mod gal. "God, give me a rich husband, I don't mind if he is a perfect ass."
HR
from Bangalore
6 years ago

A young girl married to 90 years budda who is millionaire...after few days girl's school mate/friend came to know and asked her...abey pagli kya dekh ke is budde se shaadi ki Tongue out. That girl simply replied...ek tho income aur doosra budde ka din kam Wink. Then, all will be mine Laughing. WhatsApp story!

StyleDestino
StyleDestino
from Mumbai
6 years ago

Its like asking who do u think is more important - your mother or father? I think while it depends from person to person for me I cant choose what is more important. Both are like water and air to me

Just 2-3 days back, I have had conversation in a whatsApp group on this. A girl was cribbing(?), how girls always have to sacrifice career after marriage. How uneven it is. And how does even independent,educated women leave their career, in the name of Love and family. Her point was that, society is so patriarchal that girls are forced to ditch career after marriage. I had a hard time convincing her that most of the times it's true, but many times girls willingly do it! They willingly let go off career due to either their genuiene love for her husband, or for her kids. She was not convinced with the genuine love angle. And she was of the opinion that an independent, educated, earning girl can NEVER leave her career willingly, without being forced. I had a very difficult time arguing.

Then finally, a girl only came to my rescue, she explained that there are many kinds of girls- one set of girls no longer wishes to work after marriage (even though no pressure), their intention and wish is to enjoy at someone else's money; another set of girls, who don't work willingly in order to give time to child/family, and then yet another, who are forced NOT to work post marriage.... and then yet another set of girls who manage to do both!!

And I was like "Bingo!!", this couldn't have been explained better! So basically, that's the sad part of marriage, changes, accomodations, compromises have to be made by both the parties. Now who makes more accomodations, is another  thing. (one girl corrected me that "compromise" is a wrong term. If you are "compromising" post-marriage, then there is no love left in the marriage!!).

From my point of view, the best would be that the women or man, any one of them could leave their job for a couple of years, post having kids. A child's formative years is very crucial. Proper nutrition and care is very important. After the child attains 4-5 yrs of age, both couples could start working again, juggling job and family together.

 

--

Never argue with a lady my child. Never.
Ankita Singhal
Ankita Singhal
from Mumbai
6 years ago

Marry someone who respects your wishes, your dreams and if it's making career then that too. So, question isn't really about marriage/career , it's about marrying the right person or not. Laughing Just my opinion. I have friends who are married & are still working in MNCs happily even there in-law's are supportive. 

Ankita Singhal
from Mumbai
6 years ago

And yes many leave the career happily for family. It's about personal choices. Career and marriage aren't always at the opposite sides, one shouldn't always be blamed because of another choice.

Sanjay Kamath
Sanjay Kamath
from Mumbai
5 years ago

It is purely subjective. Experiences vary greatly from person to person. There is no concrete rule. Just the luck of the draw. Embarassed

Sweta Biswal
Sweta Biswal
from Bengaluru
5 years ago

It varies from person to person....some folks are very supportive while others are not !! Ppl change and so do their priorities.....

Vijay Prabhu
Vijay Prabhu
from Mumbai
5 years ago

Shadi.com

Spelling is wrong vijay. It is shaadi.com and inke bharose ho chuki shaadi. Get up from slumber and seek advice, more preferably from "the advice shop." Rokada kharch karo. Nahi to kishto me kharch karoge xindagi bhar.
Vibha Ravi
Vibha Ravi
from Mumbai
5 years ago

To add my two bits to this conversation - It depends on what you want and who you marry.

If your partner recognizes your dreams and aspirations and encourages you to follow them, marriage is a good deal. But if no one from that side of the family is willing to support you then it's a struggle. 

Things get more complicated when you have a child. The trick is to not try being the 'ideal' mother as defined traditionally but to carve your own path and have your partner on your side. If that doesn't happen, re-evaluate what is more important to you, take steps in that direction and live by  your decisions. 

Very well said.

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